for the love my day(no kidding)

I wake up with a stiffy- just the one in my neck not anything else...

As I strutter around the room like a pricey zombie. I end up wishin I was a headless zombie- it would have been more fun-- walking around like one, eating like one, talking like- --Aaarrrghhh- one. I can imagine that even in that condition I would not care for any other zombies, so if u got ur own stiff neck story to share- share it with someone else- I am not interested!!

Along with the zombie phase comes all the whining and struggling and the anger. Like Vica once said to me - for me every freakin ailment is like a killer disease & I got 2 things to say to that:

1) its in my genes to think that way &

2) WHY THE HELL SHOULDN'T I THINK THAT WAY?????

fending for your-broken-self really aint easy! so there I am all half broken, cant move and all; when I hear the rumbling in my belly (this where I very earnestly wished I had a bitch or a slave whom I could whiplash into doing some work!!)

So I rampage through my purse and find out what a bitch technology is- so no matter how many cards u may have in ur wallet the people around (stupid home delivery restaurants) wont carry a portable card machines!!! dont look so aghast I am pricey and nobody asked ur opinion. so I am like "GRRRRR!" biscuits and chips it is!

this is where the calls start!!

Call 1

Doc: U need some more test done- u may be more sick that I thought*!!! (* was sick earlier so went in for some test)

Me: WHAAA??????!!!!!

Doc: oh yea! meet me with the reports

Me : "GRRRR"

Call 2

Ass (aka ass boss): hey! this is unacceptable!! how can u expect me to do all this work??? i cant do all this! what should i do??

Me: ya whatever!! I'l get it done!! just stop harassing me.

So I wish this would end!! And here comes

Call 3

Ass: hey man u have to check the work that goes out here

Me: Whaaa???

Ass: if not then u see....

Me: fine watever just send it!!

Call 4

Wiener Whiner (aka client): Hey i didnt get it, ur boss said u blah blah blah

Me: fine u'l get it (go away! stop callin me)

and it continues- body half broken, howling stomach and yea handicapped (redundant- who asked u??)

I needed help, so I ask the neighbor

Neighbour: Awww u pooooorrrr thhhiiiiinnnnnggg (phew)go get these meds -  yourself...

Me(to self): oh I am sorry, I guess u didnt see anything broken here....

Me: ignoring

Neighbour: yelling out loud (like the prophets to the infidels)

the gods are angry with you. Ur life is cursed and evil has befallen you. it will rain locust and diseases both eating and killing you. If u want to avoid it you need to do this......

Me: TERRIFIEDDD

25 mins later..

Me: TERRIFIEDDD

60 mins later

Me: I need new neighbours!!!!

Me contemplating: Is me and my house really cursed????hmmm.. where the hell is that Breanna???

Breanna:  STOP BLAMING CRAP FOR YOUR FCK UP!!!

Me: Whaaaa...??? I like BLAMING CRAPP!

Breanna: shut up and get a life!!!

Me: I HAVE a life!!

Breanna: oh that  life is pretty fucked up!! get A NEW ONE!! and CALL YOUR MOM

Me: HEYY!!!

me calling home...sigh..i really don't have the energy for this- i think il have a red bull...

Mom: How can u be sick?????

Me: shit happens its ok- no big deal

Mom: no its not supposed to happen- u crazy???

Mom: U R SO SICK (x 4- like a horrible tape stuck)

Me: no I am not!!

Mom: ppl die with your kind of illness!!!!(read in a dramtic ultra high pitch)

Me: WHAA..........................r u mad....NO!!

Mom: YES!!

Me: NO

Mom: YES

Me: 'NOOOOOO'

Mom: fine - i'l come down there and prove it to you!!

Me: Hey NOO!! wait wait - i'l do the damn test!!

Mom: Good! lemme know ASAP!!

Docs office

Doc: Ahh! there is nothing worry about- shit happens

Me:u sure???My mom wants to know if it will kill me!!

Doc: HAR HAR! here is the bill- only cash please!

Me: zombie style : ARRGGGHHH!!

My office:

Ass: WAAAAHHH! WAAAAH!I dont wanna loose my job waaahhhhhh

Me: WTF u talking about???

Ass: WAAAAHHHH (harder)

Blood sucking freak(read my second blog): who screwed the dummy??(a book dummy)

Ass: Spontaneously : She did(finger pointing also) she took an unexpected holiday

me: holiday???!!! I was sick U DIMWIT

Blood sucking freak: WTF- u this, u that!! u screwed! u fcuked!!

Ass sits there with cheese pop corn in one hand and a large pepsi in the other & watches the show

Me: bewildered at the cowering assfaced dimwit : FCUK U ALL!! I QUIT!!!

Atmosphere: silence all around

My Atmosphere: buzzing in  my ears

Ass: NOOOOO.....hmmm. better u than mee....I got a family to feed my balls to...waaaahhhh...sniff...sniff

Me: Fck urself

(My head to me- I should sue these buggers to teach them a lesson of lifetime!!)

Call(Home)

Mom: I wanna come

Me: NOW???!!!!!

(My head to me- WTF - GREAT!!)

Mom: Yea.. I wanna see how ur doing, etc.etc.

Me: No

Mom: y, No???

Me: NOOO Not now!!!

me updating Breanna about the office

Breanna: WTF IS WRONG WITH U????

Me: errrrrr....

Breannna: I dont know how this ends up happening always!!!fine, we'll figure something out!! watever!! bye!!!!

Me: GOSH!! what a  long day huh...- 

So I go to sleep and the next morning: I wake up with another stiffy-No u ASS its my leg!!!

my leg sprained while I was sleeping!!!!really??? Wat the hell? the gods have cursed after all... I need to throw away my mattress....